


The Rules of Fanfiction

by TheWrongWriter



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abuse of Angel Powers (Supernatural), Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angelic Grace-Powered Orgasms (Supernatural), Angst, Blow Jobs, Come as Lube, Dean being a dick, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fuck Or Die, Gabriel being a smug bastard, Hair-pulling, Heterosexual Sex, Incest, M/M, Mutual Masturbation, Pre-Lubed Archangel, Prostate Massage, Sex Pollen, Shower Sex, Sibling Rivalry, Team Free Love, Threesome - M/M/M, Wing Kink, impala!sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-11
Updated: 2019-03-11
Packaged: 2019-11-15 14:38:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 19,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18075287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheWrongWriter/pseuds/TheWrongWriter
Summary: PURE META CRACK FICTION--OR--Something is writing fanfiction aboutSupernatural, and making the Winchesters and their angels live it out.





	1. Rule #1: Celestial Beings Don't Have Gag Reflexes

**Author's Note:**

> At the request of absolutely no one, I'm re-posting my **Rules of Fanfiction** series as a single work, just because. Enjoy!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the author imagines the angels blowing their hunters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: might seem a little non-con, depending on your perspective.  
> See the

_I swear, when I started writing this I didn't know it was real. Would be real. Whatever. I just thought I was coming up with stories about my favorite TV characters. It was a way to pass the time, to occupy my mind while I staunchly ignored the world around me because, let's face it, reality sucks. Besides, writing about sex never hurt anyone, right? Right?!?_

* * * * *

Sam and Dean were in the kitchen leaning against the counters while they sipped their beers and discussed a possible poltergeist two states over. You know, typical stuff on a typical day. Until it wasn't.

Without warning, a certain archangel appeared right in front of Sam.

"Gabriel?" Sam asked, confused.

"Hiya, Sammy!" he said cheerfully.

"I thought you were dead, asshole," Dean asked, shocked.

"I guess I'm not," Gabriel replied with a grin and a shrug. Turning back to Sam, he said, "seems to me I'm back for a reason."

"Oh yeah? What reason would that be?" Sam asked. Gabriel just waggled his eyebrows and dropped to his knees, fingers making quick work of Sam's jeans.

"Whoa!" Dean exclaimed. "What the hell, dude? I'm right here!"

Before Dean could beat a hasty retreat, Castiel appeared right in front of him, his persistent disregard for personal space blocking Dean's escape.

"It's alright, Dean," Castiel told him, also dropping to his knees, "it appears that Gabriel and I have been sent here to care for you two."

Dean's confused gaze went from Cas' hands tearing at his jeans to his brother, whose head was thrown back as Gabriel went to town on Sam's cock. Sam was white-knuckling the counter as he tried to keep himself upright.

"The hell is- _oooooooh_ ," Dean's question was cut off by the wet warmth of Cas' mouth enveloping his dick. All coherent thought fled his mind as Cas worked magic on Dean's dick, the head repeatedly hitting the back of Cas' throat. Hollowing his cheeks on the upstroke and laving his tongue around Dean's thick cock on his way back down, the only thing Dean could think was  _God, I hope he swallows_.

Neither human lasted long under their angels' ministrations, Dean blowing first, straight down Cas' throat, the angel never once flinching. Sam came another minute later, his hands in Gabriel's hair, shoving his dick as far down Gabriel's throat as he could and holding as he screamed. 

When the hunters were breathing normally again and tucked back into their pants and the angels were back on their feet, Sam regained enough higher brain function to ask, "what the hell was that all about?"

"Not sure," Gabriel said, leaning into Sam's side, "but I ain't complaining!"

"If I didn't know that angels weren't susceptible to such things," Castiel said, clearing his throat, "I would say we were affected by some sort of compulsion."

"A compulsion to blow us?" Dean asked skeptically.

"Don't look a gift angel in the mouth, Deano," Gabriel said with a leer, "celestial beings don't have gag reflexes. It's probably the best head you'll ever get."

Dean blushed, earning grins from Sam and Gabriel and a shy smile from Castiel. "Not complaining, just wondering what could do that."

"Dean is correct," Cas stated, trying to fight the blush rising in his own cheeks. "Something strong enough to bring an archangel back from the dead and compel him to do anything may be a bigger threat than the... awkwardness... it created."

"And who knows if it's done yet," Sam said, looking a bit frightened at that thought. The rest of the men fell silent as they warily looked at each other.

* * * * * 

_I swear, I really didn't know. I was just having fun. And I still had a pretty long list to work through. Maybe I'm a god. A cruel, cruel, capricious god._


	2. Rule #2: Dean Will Always Take Care of Sammy. ALWAYS.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sam is concerned and Dean "comforts" him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: Again, could be non-con based on your perception.

_I know they're brothers, but they're both hot and_ damn _. The thought of the Winchester boys together always gets me hot and bothered. Besides, they're fictional characters, so it's less squicky, right?_

* * * * *

Sam was reclined on the couch, book in hand and a pile next to him on the floor. The poltergeist would have to wait, because whatever the hell was going on now had to be addressed before whatever this was escalated.

"Hey," Dean said, walking into the room, "nothing on the internet about random blowjobs or anything else that looks like magic sexual compulsion. You find anything?"

Sam shook his head and set his book on top of the pile next to him. "Nothing yet. I started with succubi and inucubi, but they're not strong enough to resurrect an archangel. I also checked djinn, in case this is an elaborate dream, but it doesn't fit." Sam let out a shaky breath. "What if what happened before was just to throw us off? What if whatever this is gets violent, even deadly? Billie said we're out of chances; if we die again, it's for good." That train of thought tightened Sam's throat and he fought the tears that were threatening to form. "I can't watch you die again, Dean."

In an instant, Dean was sitting next to Sam on the couch, hand on his brother's arm to calm his fears. "Hey," he said softly, voice hoarse, "I'm not gonna die on you. Not like this." Dean couldn't stand seeing the fear in his little brother's eyes. It had been ingrained in him for as long as he could remember, take care of Sammy. He had to do something to soothe his nerves.

Raising his other arm, Dean pulled Sam close to him, offering what comfort he could. "It's gonna be okay, Sammy," he whispered, stroking Sam's hair. He pressed kisses to Sam's temple until he felt him relax against his side. When Sam looked up into his brother's eyes, the mood shifted from one of comfort to one of need.

Eyes fluttering closed, Dean dropped his mouth to Sam's, just a soft brush of lips causing Sam to inhale sharply. The sparks were enough to ignite the flames, each man searching for more as they dove into each other. Fingers carded through hair, hands searched for skin, hips moved seeking friction. At the first denim-clad brush of erection against erection, Sam gasped, then whined.

 _Gotta take care of Sammy_ was the thought that raced through Dean's mind as he reached between them and released Sam's straining cock from his jeans. The head was already soaked and as Dean ran his thumb over the slit at the tip Sam moaned into his mouth, his hips moving of their own accord, pleading for more without words. Slicking up his hand with his brother's precome, Dean started working his shaft with slow, sure strokes.

Sam broke the kiss on a groan, head falling back. "Dean," he whined, knowing he needed more but not knowing what.

"I gotcha Sammy," Dean said against Sam's neck, trailing kisses across the soft skin. He let go of Sam's cock long enough to free his own and lined them up, taking both in one hand. Dean knew it was what Sammy needed when he cried out and arched into Dean's touch. Dean's hand moved faster and faster, stripping their dicks as theirs hearts pounded against each other's chests and their lungs burned for more oxygen. Their hips stuttered into Dean's fist as first Sam, then Dean, came in a hot, sticky mess.

As their breathing slowed, they heard a slow clap from a few feet away. They both looked up to see Castiel, head tilted in adorable confusion, and Gabriel applauding the performance. They looked back at each other, eyes comically widening as they realized what they'd just done and Dean jumping away as fast as he could.

"Zachariah hit the nail on the head when he said you two were erotically codependent," Gabriel said with a grin. Castiel just gave him a withering look.

"Shut up, Gabriel," Sam muttered as he blushed furiously, stripping off his Henley to wipe the come off his abdomen. Not even glancing at his brother, he held the used shirt out to him to clean himself off. Dean rolled his eyes and snatched it from him, wiping off their come and tucking himself back into his jeans.

"That wasn't us, dude," he tried to explain. He turned to the other angel and said, "Cas, you know  
me, you've been inside my head, you know I don't think about my brother like that."

"I know, Dean," the angel replied. "Did you feel compelled to be intimate with Sam? This may have been the same thing that compelled Gabriel and I to perform oral sex on you two."

Dean shuddered at Cas' blunt words. "It was weird, I felt compelled to do _something_ , but the only thing on my brain was _take care of Sammy_. Not like I'd ever thought about taking care of him like  _that_ ," he added in a hurry.

"It was hot, though," Gabriel said with a grin. "Almost Casa Erotica-worthy. But the whole take care of Sammy thing sounds like bad fanfiction. Definitely something that knows about your attachment to your brother."

"Oh God," Dean said, running his hand down his face in exasperation. "Please tell me we don't have a witch on our hands with a fetish for Chuck's books."

"A witch wouldn't have the power to bring Gabriel back, nor the power to compel either of us," Castiel pointed out.

"Then we keep looking before we're fucked," Sam said, " _literally_."

* * * * *

_I love the relationship between Dean and Sam. I've always wondered what it would be like to be close to any of my siblings like that. Or at all. Even civility would be better than the open hostility from them. Definitely not into any of them the way I sometimes imagine Dean and Sam being into each other. Now Gabriel, on the other hand-I'd love to have a guardian angel like him..._


	3. Rule #3: Gabriel Didn't Pick His Vessel For Its Height

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sam finds out that Gabriel's height doesn't mean anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: Again, could be non-con based on your perception.

_Everyone has a favorite character of all time, maybe just a favorite character in each show or movie they watch. Gabriel is my favorite character on the show. I mean, I relate to Dean on so many levels, and Sam and Cas are just adorable, but Gabriel is a firecracker. I love the attitude, the swagger, the growth, and he's pretty damned hot, too. Argue the point with me all you want, but I guess I have a type. Besides, my daddy always said you can't pound in a railroad spike with a ball peen hammer._

* * * * *

"What did Marie say?" Sam asked, walking into the library as Dean set down his phone.

"Other than rewriting the second act, she hasn't done anything new," Dean replied. "What about Becky?"

"She actually met someone," Sam said, sounding as shocked as Dean felt. "She said she doesn't have time for magic or Supernatural anymore. If she hadn't been so quick to get me off the phone without flirting with me, I wouldn't have believed it."

"Yeah, because you're so irresistible," Gabriel said, getting the hunters' attention. Sam rolled his eyes and Dean snorted.

"You guys find anything out?" Dean asked the angels.

"There may be a text regarding resurrecting angels," Castiel told them. "There are some Aramaic texts on display at a museum in Dallas that could give some insight."

Dean clapped his hands and rubbed them together. "Sounds like a road trip to me! Sammy," Dean side-eyed his brother, "maybe you should stay here and, uh, keep researching. Maybe if we split up this thing can't-"

"Yeah," Sam rushed to agree. Last thing he wanted was to be stuck in close quarters with his brother if whatever this is was making them crawl all over each other. "You head on down there, I'll keep searching from here."

Dean pointed a gun-finger at Sam, pulling the trigger and winking at him. "You're the best, Sammy."

"I can meet you there once you arrive," Castiel told Dean. "I will be able to deduce if any of the texts will be of use."

"Sounds like a plan," Dean told them, waving one hand at them as he left. Cas left in a rustle of wings almost immediately after.

"Welp," Gabriel said, sauntering over to a bookshelf, "looks like it's just you and me, Sam-a-lam."

"Think that's such a good idea?" Sam asked warily. "This thing is powerful enough to compel you, compel us both. Might be asking for trouble."

Gabriel snorted. "I am trouble, Sammy. You just do your thing, I'll stay out of your way. If I start feeling like getting it on, I'll pop outta here. Sound good?"

"Yeah," Sam reluctantly agreed, "whatever." He set up his laptop at a table far from Gabriel and started in on his research.

After about an hour, Sam and Gabriel were still fine. Sam hadn't found any other reports of magical sexual compulsion, so the fanfiction thing, or at least Winchester-centric theory, held a little more weight. Gabriel agreed, but was still stumped as to what would have the power to resurrect him. He went through book after book, having to snap down books from higher shelves. Sam laughed a little more each time the archangel couldn't reach a book that was in easy reach for his overgrown self.

"Care to share the joke with the rest of the class?" Gabriel asked after Sam's last burst of laughter.

Sam leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest, grinning widely. "I just think it's hilarious that you're so short for an archangel."

Gabriel snorted. "I didn't choose this vessel for its height," he said with a smirk before turning back to grab another book.

That thought made Sam's mouth go dry. He was a big guy, and he was big everywhere. He had about eight inches on the archangel. No way was Gabriel packing anything close to what he was.

"I call bullshit," he said smugly.

With an arched eyebrow, Gabriel unzipped his jeans and tugged them down. Apparently, archangels didn't believe in underwear. Even flaccid it looked larger than average, but still not as big as his own dick. _But why the hell am I looking?_ Sam shook himself and ducked his head, muttering "whatever" as he went back to his laptop.

"Still don't believe me, Sammy?" Gabriel asked, stroking his dick as it came alive in his hand.

"Gabriel," Sam asked, a warning in his tone, "what are you doing?"

"Think you're bigger than me, Gigantor?" Gabriel asked in a husky voice as he stalked towards Sam. "Grab your ruler and prove it."

This time when Sam looked, Gabriel's dick was much bigger, fattened up so that it barely fit in Gabriel's palm. _Oh shit, I don't think he's even half hard_. There was a good chance he was as big as Sam, but Sam still doubted it. Still, just to save face, he stood and dropped his own jeans and boxer briefs, a little surprised to find he was already half hard himself.

Opening a desk drawer and pulling out a bottle of lube ( _why was it there, and how did I know where it was?_ ), Sam popped the cap and slicked up his cock. Face to face now, they stroked themselves to full hardness under each other's gaze.

And there was the proof. Gabriel was just slightly longer than Sam, and much thicker. Gabriel couldn't even get his entire hand around it. With only a slight hesitation, Sam reached out to see if he could fit his own hand around it. Gabriel groaned as Sam had to squeeze slightly to touch his middle finger to his thumb.

"Mighty nice hands ya got there, Sammy," Gabriel drawled.

"Yeah?" Sam responded with a smirk.

"Oh yeah."

Maintaining the contact between his thumb and middle finger, Sam started a slow pace up and down Gabriel's shaft. After a few strokes, he hissed as he felt Gabriel's smaller hand try to wrap around his own dick, moving at a slightly faster pace.

"Didn't you ever learn it's not nice to tease?" Gabriel huffed out. His words had the desired effect as Sam started stripping his dick. Gabriel matched him stroke for stroke, head leaning into Sam's shoulder. Before long they were chasing their orgasms, Gabriel reaching his first, with Sam close behind.

"That was fucked up," Sam panted.

"Yeah, but I'm not complaining," Gabriel laughed, and Sam laughed with him.

"Don't tell Dean, okay?"

"As long as you remember who has the bigger dick," Gabriel said with a wink, setting off another round of laughter.

* * * * *

_So Sabriel is my OTP, sue me. Doesn't mean I don't love me some Destiel!_


	4. Rule #4: Castiel's Hair Always Looks Like He Just Had Sex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Dean notices Castiel's sex hair and wonders what it would be like to be the person who makes it look that way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: You know the drill, may be non-con depending on your perspective.

_Dean Winchester is my spirit animal. He practically raised his little brother after his mom died and his dad started hunting; I practically raised my little brothers after my dad died and my mom started working. He battled monsters; I battled monsters of the human male variety. He died & came back; I died and came back (the paramedics said I was dead for 37 seconds). He suffered torture at the hands of a demon; I suffered torture at the hands of a demon (again, of the human male variety). The only thing I haven't found that Dean has is one great love. Sure, Dean and Cas aren't canon (yet), but the subtext is everywhere._

* * * * *

Dean thought splitting up was a good idea. If they were together then whatever this thing was could possibly make them do more bullshit. He didn't want to even think about what he did with Sam. It was just so _wrong_. He shuddered and cranked Zeppelin up a few more decibels.

And then there was Cas. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get the image of the angel on his knees out of his head; his chapped lips stretched obscenely around his dick, sky blue eyes glassy and framed by full, dark lashes. And then there was the hair. Dean hadn't grabbed Cas' hair, didn't touch a single strand, but when he stood up his hair looked liked he had just been thoroughly fucked. Did it always look like that?

And with that thought stuck in his head, he checked out Cas' hair every time the angel checked in with him. _Yep, still looks freshly fucked._ He missed half of what Cas had to say wondering if he was actually getting some action or if his hair was just naturally like that.

Dean arrived in Dallas and navigated Central Expressway to the Museum of Biblical Art. He parked at the shopping center across the street and waited for night to fall. Shortly after sunset, Cas returned and described his plan to Dean on how he would enter the museum and disable the cameras and the security system so that Dean could enter. They'd have about fifteen minutes to see if the text Cas had heard about would be of any use. Dean stared at Cas' hair and nodded.

The plan went off without a hitch. However, after scanning the text in question, Castiel didn't believe it would be of any use. Dean still took pictures of as many pages as he could for Sam and Gabriel to look at. They got out and Cas reengaged the cameras and the security system before any rent-a-cops came to check it out.

Dean led Cas to the dark corner of the shopping center parking lot where he parked Baby. He texted the pictures he took to Cas' phone, then emailed them to his brother. He assumed Cas would fly off to wherever he went when he wasn't with the Winchesters, so he was surprised when Cas climbed into the passenger seat, shutting the door behind him and turning to face Dean. Dean sat there, dumbfounded, staring at Cas' hair.

"Hey Cas," Dean said, licking his lips, "I think you might wanna take off. I think that compulsion thing is hitting me again."

"I believe it's affecting me as well," Cas replied. "I'm unable to move at the moment. Maybe if we act as though we're giving into it, we can break free of it before it takes hold."

Dean swallowed and nodded. "Yeah, good idea." Dean slid across the Impala's seat until he was in Cas' personal space. He reached out for Cas' hair, running his fingers through it. No matter what he did-combing it with his fingers, patting it down, pushing it back-it still looked like Cas' head had been thrashing around on a pillow. And that was a thought _that_ made his cock fatten up in his jeans.

"'Kay, Cas," Dean said breathlessly, "time to make a break for it."

Castiel opened his eyes, pupils blown with barely a ring of blue left. He blinked a few times before responding, "I don't think I can."

Dean growled before pulling back and yanking Cas by the hips until the angel was laid flat in the front seat. He pushed Cas' legs apart, draping one over the seat, and fell on top of him, grasping his hair in both hands and dragging him in for a brutal kiss. Cas' arms came up around Dean, holding him tight and exploring the man's body with his hands. When his hands reached Dean's ass, he squeezed his cheeks and pulled them close to grind their erections together, making both men groan into each other's mouths.

Dean finally had to break the kiss to get a lungful of air. He stared into Cas' eyes as he fisted handfuls of hair. He wanted to say something, but he wasn't sure if he wanted to stop or keep going, or how much was the compulsion and how much was his own libido. Cas said it all though when he reached two fingers up and touched Dean's forehead, divesting him of all his clothing in the blink of an eye. Cas' own clothes were gone a fraction of a second later, leaving them skin to skin.

Dean was pretty sure now that all this was due to the compulsion, but he stopped caring. Cas felt too good underneath him. He reached out to the glove compartment and opened it, snagging his emergency bottle of lube. With practiced ease, he popped the cap one-handed and spilled a copious amount over his fingers before flicking the cap closed with his thumb and dropping it to the floorboard.

"Dean?" Cas asked quietly, and Dean could swear he heard lust in the angel's voice. He slipped his hand between their bodies and ran a lubed finger around Cas' furled entrance. At the feeling of the nerves in his rim being stimulated, Cas moaned and let his head fall to one side. _He's not thrashing yet, but it's a start._

Dean deftly worked one finger into Cas' ass, pulling the most sinful sounds from the angels mouth. In no time he worked a second finger, then a third, into Cas, making his back arch and his hips rock into his fingers. When Cas uttered another "Dean" in a strained, pleading voice, Dean pulled his fingers out and lubed up his cock before lining up.

"Sorry, man," Dean mumbled before slowly pushing into his friend's tight hole. When the head popped past the rim, Cas' head fell back on a slutty moan. That was all the encouragement Dean needed to continue his slow slide into his own personal Heaven. Cas' ass was tight and hot and  _perfect_ and in the back of his mind Dean wondered why he'd never considered this before. He rolled his hips in a steady rhythm, pumping into Cas gently as the angel's head rolled from side to side. Cas would roll his hips in return, meeting Dean thrust for thrust.

When Cas' whines and moans reached a fever pitch, Dean pulled back and sat up. He grabbed Cas' hips and started pounding into him relentlessly, making Cas cry out and _now his head is_ _thrashing_. In no time, Cas' back was bowing beautifully off the seat as he came screaming Dean's name, stripes of hot come splashing up his chest. His ass clenched hard around Dean's dick, dragging the hunter's orgasm from him. Dean howled out his release, his hips slamming him in deep and steady until he collapsed in a heap on top of Cas, completely spent.

As Dean's breathing returned to normal, Cas tapped his forehead again, and Dean was grateful to feel the sticky messes between them disappear. And in true Dean Winchester fashion, this is where the guilt settled in.

"Sorry about this, Cas," Dean muttered into Cas' chest, not making any attempt to move yet. "You know I'd never force this on you, you know?"

One of Cas' hands came up and started stroking Dean's hair. "I know, Dean. You're not at fault here. However, I'm grateful you made it a pleasurable experience for me."

Dean's head shot up, his eyes meeting Cas'. "Yeah?" He asked with a cocky grin.

Castiel chuckled. "Yes, Dean. It was an extremely enjoyable experience, one I wouldn't mind repeating without the compulsion."

Dean laughed and laid his head back down on Cas' chest. "Let's not tell Sammy that yet, okay? We gotta stop this... whatever it is... first."

"Agreed," Castiel said, wrapping his arms around Dean.

* * * * *  
 _Yup, loves me some Destiel. If the writers ever do move past the subtext and get these two together, I think the entire fandom would explode. Not to mention all the money the underwear industry would make from replacing all those ruined panties. But it's not gonna happen anytime soon. Until that happens, it's fun to think about all the little nuggets the writers have already thrown us, like Sam mentioning Sastiel._


	5. Rule #5: Sam is Perfectly Proportional

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Castiel learns that every part of Sam's body is in perfect proportion to his height.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, warning for non-con if that's how you see it. However, I think by now everyone is seeing a pattern of the guys not really minding this shit.

_Can we all just agree that the 200th episode was amazing? I especially like the part where Sam was picking apart the pronunciation of Destiel (Deastiel?). Dean was all "that's what bothers you?", but when Sam asked about Sastiel, Dean got pissy. Yeah, lots of subtext there. Also made me wonder if Sam ever harbored any feelings for their resident angel._

* * * * *

When Dean and Castiel returned to the bunker, they found Sam and Gabriel sitting at opposite ends of the map table with printouts of Dean's photos strewn between them. Gabriel was poring over the ancient words, while Sam was clicking and scrolling furiously on his laptop. 

"Hey," Dean called out as he and Castiel entered the room, "anything happen while we were gone?"

"NO!" "NOPE!" Sam and Gabriel said simultaneously, and just a little too quickly. "How about you guys?" Sam asked. "You run into any problems?"

"Nope," Dean replied a little too casually, a slight flush creeping up his neck, "smooth sailing. Any of that worth anything?" he asked, pointing to the pictures.

"Nothing I didn't already know," Gabriel said with a shrug. Then he grinned. "Sammy's got some pretty good theories though."

Sam blushed as he turned his laptop towards Dean and Castiel to show them the page he was on, a fan site for Chuck's _Supernatural_ books. Dean laughed and asked, "you been getting in touch with your inner teenage girl, Samantha?" Sam just gave Dean one of his bitchfaces.

"Remember when we first found out about Chuck's books, and during our research we found out about Sam girls and Dean girls and Sam-slash-Dean girls?" Dean grimaced and nodded. "Well, since Becky posted Chuck's unpublished works online, the fans have developed what they call OTPs-One True Pairings. The majority of the fans seem to think that you and Cas are destined to be together." Dean and Castiel side-eyed each other at that. 

"It gets better," Gabriel said with glee. "Tell them what else you found."

If it were possible, Sam turned a deeper shade of red. "It seems a lot of the fans think I deserve my own angel, and have been pairing me with Gabriel."

Dean laughed at that. "What the hell did you do to piss them off, to pair you up with him?"

"Hey!" Gabriel said indignantly. "I'm quite the catch, Deano. Besides, it's an improvement over that demon bitch he was banging, if you ask me." This time Gabriel got the bitchface from Sam, which just made him laugh. "Oh yeah, they've cataloged and numbered Sam's bitchfaces, too. It's hilarious."

"You gotta get me a list of those," Dean laughed. "You know, just for comparison."

"So you still think this is related to fanfiction?" Castiel asked Sam, trying to get the conversation back on track.

"Pretty sure," Sam replied. "If we split up, I think if you and I stick together and Dean and Gabriel stick together, we'll avoid the fanfiction pairings and this thing won't mess with us again."

"Sounds reasonable," Castiel agreed. "Why don't you and I go to Chuck's old home and look for any unfinished manuscripts or anything that can give us insight into what's been happening. I'm sure Dean and Gabriel can stay here and manage not to kill each other."

"Ha ha," Dean said dryly. "Let's just figure this thing out before we have another couch incident."

Dean shuddered at the thought. Castiel nodded, placed a hand on Sam's shoulder, and they were gone.

A moment later they were standing in front of Chucks old house. The yard was a little overgrown, but still looked basically the same. The front door was locked, but Castiel made quick work of that. Sam cracked a joked under his breath about breaking into God's house as they entered the living room. It was the same disaster as before with papers and booze bottles everywhere. Sam flicked the light switch a couple times, noticing the lack of electricity. He opened the curtains over the front window to let in some light, and he and Cas started sifting through piles of papers on Chuck's desk.

They worked in silence, flipping through pages of rough drafts covered in red ink. When Sam looked up from his pages, he found Castiel squinting at a page, head tilted to one side on confusion. "Find something, Cas?" he asked.

Castiel looked up at Sam, then back at the page, then back up at Sam, his eyes taking in the man's body. "How would one know if they were 'perfectly proportional'?" the angel asked, and Sam could hear the air quotes. He went to stand behind Cas to read what he had found. It was another rough draft, a bit older, and Sam blushed furiously when he recognized what he was reading. His marriage to Becky was magically-induced and short-lived, but she was fond of touching him and remarking on his proportions.

"It's nothing," Sam replied, his face turning red. "Some people think that men with larger bodies also have larger..." he trailed off, his hand vaguely waving around his crotch.

"Penises," Castiel supplied matter-of-factly.

"Yeah, but it's not necessarily true," Sam supplied, knowing firsthand of a short archangel who was definitely larger than his height would indicate.

"But some people have a preference for partners who are proportional?" Cas asked, genuinely curious.

"I guess? I've never really thought about it." Sam was getting uncomfortable with the conversation, but he couldn't seem to stop himself. "Everyone seems to have a preference, either length or girth, but the general consensus is that bigger is better."

Castiel seemed to consider that a moment, still looking at Sam. With no discernible change in his expression, he simply said, "show me."

Flabbergasted, Sam just stared at Castiel for a minute. He wasn't ashamed of his dick in the slightest, but just whipping it out for the angel's inspection was ridiculous. However, he found himself undoing his pants and dropping trou right there in Chuck's living room.

"Hey Cas?" Sam started, but Cas was already examining Sam's flaccid dick, head tilted to one side. When he looked back up, Cas was staring at Sam's dick with a look of confused concern on his face. "I fail to see how _that_ is proportional to your height," Cas stated.

Sam spluttered, red-faced with embarrassment. "No one looks proportional when they're not erect, Cas," he tried explaining.

Castiel nodded his head thoughtfully at that, then reached forward and wrapped one hand around Sam's dick. Sam sucked in a breath, desperately wanting to back away, but not being able to. The warmth and pressure from Cas' hand had him chubbing up nicely, but he had to try to stop this for both of their sakes. Once again, he was going to warn Cas about the compulsion thing, but once again Cas interrupted him.

"I wonder if your penis is as large as your brother's," Cas asked thoughtfully.

"WHAT?!?" Same exclaimed. "When did you measure Dean's dick?"

"I didn't," Cas said.    

Now Sam was really confused. "Okay, what's the point of _this_ ," he said, hands waving at Cas' hand on his dick, "if you don't know how big Dean's dick is? You have nothing to compare it to."

"I didn't measure it, I felt it," Cas amended. "In my mouth, and when he penetrated me. It was a very pleasurable experience."

That right there should have deflated Sam's dick, but for some bizarre reason it had the opposite effect. The thought of his big brother plowing into the angel had Sam rock hard almost instantly and _what the fuck is going on?!?_ And then the gears in his head clicked into place before screeching to a halt.

"So, what? You want to compare our sizes by...?" Sam trailed off, hoping this wasn't going where he thought is was going, because he didn't think he'd be able to stop himself if it was.

Castiel pulled a bottle of lube out of his trenchcoat pocket, a bottle Sam recognized as the bottle Dean keeps in the Impala's glove compartment, and set it onto Chuck's desk. He looked Sam dead on with his 'I am an angel of the Lord and you will obey me' face and said, "I would like you to penetrate me."

Yep, it went there. Castiel wanted Sam to fuck him right there in Chuck's house. He knew he should say no, should find a way to extricate himself from the situation, but whatever it was compelling them to do these things wasn't letting up and Sam could feel his fingers itching to reach for the angel. Fuck it. This was happening whether they wanted it to or not, so Sam yanked Cas towards him by the waist of his pants, undid the belt and his fly, yanked his pants down to his knees, turned him around, and bent him over Chuck's desk, scattering papers everywhere. Sam quickly uncapped the bottle of lube and slicked up his fingers, then slid his forefinger into Cas easily, all the way to the third knuckle in one smooth movement. The intrusion pulled a deep  
moan from the angel, spurring Sam on.

It barely took any time to work Cas up to three fingers, the angel panting and groaning the entire time. When Sam wiggled a fourth finger in, a pornographic moan ripped from Castiel's throat and that was it for Sam. He withdrew his fingers from Cas' ass with a messy squelching noise, Cas whining at the loss. He slicked up his cock with the lube left on his fingers, then steadily fed it into Cas' ass, Cas moaning the entire way until Sam bottomed out.

"You okay, Cas?" Sam asked breathlessly. Cas nodded and pushed his hips back, giving Sam the go-ahead. Sam started up a steady pace, trying hard not to let the pleasure build too fast. If Castiel had recently been 'penetrated' by Dean, he shouldn't be so tight, but damned if Cas didn't squeeze Sam's dick like a vice. If he had any chance of making this good for Cas, he had to get a better angle. Sam pushed Cas' hips down slightly with each thrust until he hit paydirt, making Cas wail as Sam hit his prostate. Once found, Sam attacked it mercilessly until Cas was screaming and shooting his load across the desk. Sam filled Cas up not long after, his orgasm intensified by the contractions of Cas' muscles around his cock.

"You and Dean are about the same length," Cas said, leaning his forehead down to the desk, "but I believe you are much thicker. I prefer Dean's size, though, as well as his technique."

Sam couldn't help but laugh at Castiel's clinical assessment. Part of him wanted to be offended that the angel preferred Dean, but the entire situation was just so fucked up that he was gonna let his brother have that one.

Sam slowly pulled out and stepped back, Cas turning in place and raising two fingers to his forehead to clean him up. Sam looked down, then back up to Cas with a grin. "Thanks, Cas, glad you enjoyed it. Now can we get back to work? Who knows what other trouble this thing is going to cause all of us."

"Agreed," Cas said, cleaning himself up with barely a twitch and resuming his search nonchalantly, as if Sam didn't just pound him into Chuck's desk. Sam groaned at the thought and resumed searching through the papers on the desk. Well, the ones that weren't sticky, anyways.

* * * * *

_I do love seeing everyone getting a turn. Speaking of turns, I wonder what kind of trouble Dean and Gabriel could get into?_


	6. Rule #6: Dean Likes to Cuddle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Dean is a dick, Gabriel is an asshole, and everyone is satisfied in the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's a little more non-con than the others, because really, Dean should know better than to piss off Gabriel. Doesn't mean he didn't like it though ;)

_I love reading Dean/Gabriel fanfiction. I love the way they antagonize each other. Sometimes Gabriel likes to push his tricks too far, sometimes Dean wants to just shut him up by shoving his dick down the archangel's throat. It's always a good time when you put these two in a room together!_

* * * * *

Dean and Gabriel were sitting in the kitchen, both had their chairs leaned back and feet up on the table. Gabriel kept tossing gumdrops in the air, catching every single one in his mouth without fail. Dean was working on his fifth (or was it sixth?) beer, trying not to let the archangel annoy the piss out of him. Neither felt like research and they were bored out of their minds. Currently, Gabriel was listing for Dean all the ways he had killed him at the Mystery spot, providing colorful commentary on each death.

"The bad fish taco was just for shits and giggles," Gabriel said, another gumdrop sailing into his mouth. "Nothing like playing to urban legends."

"No wonder Sam wouldn't let me near a food truck for months," Dean grumbled, finishing off his bottle and lining it up on the table.

"He'd still let you shower though," Gabriel quipped. "Did he put those old lady adhesives in the tubs after you slipped and fell?"

"No, but he lectured me about being careful every time I went into a bathroom." Dean got up to grab another beer from the fridge, only to find they were out. "Think you can snap up some more beer, shortstack?"

Gabriel snapped his fingers and a fresh six-pack appeared in the fridge. Dean grabbed a bottle and twisted the cap off, saluting Gabriel with the bottle before bringing it to his lips. He promptly spit it out when he tasted the sickeningly sweet liquid. "What the hell is this shit?" he demanded, dropping the bottle in the trash.

"Huckleberry Honey Ale. It's good shit, so don't waste it," Gabriel said, throwing a gumdrop at Dean. Dean picked the gumdrop up off the floor and threw it back at Gabriel with a muttered, "asshole."

"Don't piss me off, Winchester," he warned, "unless you feel like reliving our greatest hits. I could kill you and bring you back a couple dozen times before Sammy and Cassie get back."

"If you're gonna kill me, then at least be original," Dean snapped, hunting through the cabinets for the hard liquor.

"I am a fount of original ideas," Gabriel replied, throwing another gumdrop at Dean.

Dean picked up the gumdrop and pegged it at him this time, smacking him right in the face. "Yeah, original like a Looney Tunes cartoon, dropping pianos on people and electrocuting them. Face it, you're a hack who's been playing a Pagan god for too long to be anything but a bad rerun."

Gabriel was never known for his patience or level-headedness, and thanks to the elder Winchester he ran out of both very quickly. With a snap of his fingers, Dean was on his knees, unable to move or speak. Gabriel slowly set his feet on the floor and rose from his chair, stalking Dean like a big cat, circling him until he stood directly in front of the man.

"You've got a big mouth, Winchester," Gabriel said dangerously. "Is it good for anything other than getting you into trouble?" Dean opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out. He settled for narrowing his eyes at the archangel.

Gabriel reached out and ran a thumb over Dean's bottom lip, causing the hunter to suck in a silent breath. His fingertips trailed over Dean's cheekbone, gently stroking his face. "You call them bad reruns," he said with a wicked grin, "I call them classics. And Pagan gods do love their classics-overindulgence, debauchery, sacrifices. It may be overdone, doesn't mean it's not still enjoyable."

With a snap of Gabriel's fingers, all of Dean's clothes were gone and his arms pulled tight behind his back. Dean tried to struggle, but couldn't move. His mouth opened and closed, but no sound came out. He looked almost frantic. Gabriel snapped his fingers, and words came pouring out of Dean's mouth.

"The fuck are you doing?!? You fuck people up, not rape them! This isn't you, it's whatever the fuck is compelling us to fuck each other! You-" Gabriel cut him off with another snap of his fingers.

"You've got a point, Deano. I've never taken a sacrifice that wasn't willingly given. So how about I make it good for you, hmmm? Make you willing?" Gabriel quirked an eyebrow, and with a flick of his wrist a jolt of arousal hit Dean. It started from behind his balls and raced up his spine, unable to shiver at the sensation but wanting to desperately. His mouth dropped open and his eyes widened as he started at Gabriel in shock. The archangel simply smirked.

"Liked that, did ya?" he asked playfully. He sent another shock of grace through Dean's system, sending pleasure to every last nerve ending in his body. When Dean's head fell back on a silent moan, Gabriel grasped his hair and pulled his head forward again. "Want more?" All Dean could do was nod. With another snap of his fingers, Gabriel gave Dean back his voice and said, "you gotta beg for it, Deano."

"Take whatever you're doing and shove it up your ass," Dean said weakly.

Gabriel threw his head back with a laugh. He let go of Dean's head, letting it loll to one side as Dean tried to regain some muscle control. "Excellent suggestion, but how about we shove it up  _your_ ass?" Gabriel raised his hand again, pausing long enough for Dean to see what he was about to do, then snapped his fingers. Dean howled as his prostate was assaulted by Gabriel's grace, his entire body shaking despite Gabriel's control over it. With another snap, it ended almost as quickly as it started.

"Not even a pretty please?" Gabriel said, mock pouting. Dean's head lolled again, but he grunted out a weak, "fuck you." "As you wish," Gabriel replied, pulsing his grace against Dean's prostate now, milking it until a steady stream of precome came from Dean's dick and a steady stream of moans came from his mouth. Once again, Gabriel stopped it all suddenly with a snap of his fingers.

Sweaty, shaky, and on edge, Dean's entire body was lit up and on the precipice of orgasm. He didn't want to give Gabriel the satisfaction, but he needed to come so fucking bad. He might have been able to hold out if he didn't _want_ it. "Please," Dean whispered.

Gabriel looked like he won the lottery. Cupping an ear with his hand, he said, "What was that, Deano? I didn't catch that."

" _Please_ ," he ground out. "Please, finish this."

"Finish? But I'm having so much fun! I'm just dying to hear you beg me for what you want. _Very_ _explicitly_." Gabriel smirked at Dean, waiting.

"Gabriel, PLEASE! Do whatever you want to me, fuck me, blow me, whatever the fuck you were doing before, just let me come!" Dean was pleading now, no shame, tears running down his face. He wanted release more than anything by this point. And that was all Gabriel wanted from him, to take him down a peg and make him beg for what he wanted. With a flick of his wrist, grace flooded Dean's system, causing his entire body to ignite and tip him over the precipice. Dean came harder and longer than he ever had before. As Gabriel released his hold on him, Dean slumped to the ground and rolled to his side.

Gabriel crouched down next to Dean, poking him in the ribs like something he found on the side of the road. "You okay there, Deano?"

"You're an asshole," Dean muttered as he caught his breath, "but that was awesome." Before Gabriel knew what was happening, Dean pulled him down to the floor next to him and wrapped his body around the archangel's. He pushed and pulled and tugged and fluffed up Gabriel like a pillow until he was satisfied and comfortable.

Gabriel chuckled, "you're a cuddler, aren't you Winchester?" When Dean didn't do anything more than grunt, Gabriel softly snapped his fingers, relocating them to the couch and covering them with a blanket.

"So help me, you breathe a word of this to anyone and I'll get out the holy oil and barbecue your ass," Dean mumbled as he snuggled deeper into Gabriel and fell asleep.

Gabriel snapped up a cell phone and took a selfie with Dean asleep on his shoulder.

* * * * *

_I like to think that the reason Dean and Gabriel annoy the hell out of each other is because they're so alike. Also, I like to think they'd be amazing in bed together because they think alike and could get each other off just by doing the things they think they'd enjoy themselves. Of course, there would be a metric shit ton of snark along the way, which I am absolutely okay with. I'm also okay with the long, slow, loving torture that could be had in bed as well._


	7. Rule #7: Wings Are The Best Erogenous Zone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Castiel is embarrassed of his wings, and Dean and Sam convince him how  
> awesome they are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: Again, non-con if that's your perception (because of the compulsion); however, the boys really don't have a problem with it at this point.

_You know what I really wanna see on the show? Cas' wings. Yeah, I know we've seen the shadows, but I want his wings to come out full force. And I wanna see Dean and Sam entranced by them._

* * * * *

When Sam and Cas arrived back at the bunker, they found the strangest sight-Dean and Gabriel cuddled up on the couch asleep under a blanket, and if Sam didn't know any better, he'd swear Dean wasn't wearing any clothes. He leaned over to shake his brother's shoulder, the blanket sliding down to expose Dean's bare torso. _Holy shit, I think he_ is _naked._

"Sammy?" Dean said groggily, blinking his eyes and starting to stretch until he remembered where he was and what state he was in. He pulled the blanket off Gabriel and wrapped it around himself as he sat up. "I think whatever's fucking with us knows what's in our heads. I mean, no one knew-" Dean stopped his train of thought as he stared over Sam's shoulder in awe. Sam turned to see what caused that kind of reaction in his brother, and was greeted by the sight of Cas with large black wings protruding from his back.

"Holy shit..." Sam said reverently.

Cas tilted his head in confusion. He turned to see what the Winchesters were staring at and was greeted with the sight of his own wings materialized on their plane of existence. There was still plenty of damage to be seen on them, but they were recovering nicely. Still, if there was ever a time for the Winchesters to see his wings, Castiel would not have picked this moment. Patchy spots of new growth were interspersed with his existing feathers and bald spots from where they were yanked out at the root during the Fall. Some laid down neatly in place, while others were sticking out at odd angles.

"Looking a little rough around the edges there, Cassie," Gabriel said sleepily, sitting up behind Dean. Castiel flushed, and with a mumbled, "excuse me," rushed from the room, Dean and Sam staring after him.

"How the hell..." Dean wondered, his gaze following Cas.

"I'm guessing whatever's been messing with us pulled his wings out," Sam said. "There's a lot of wing kink in the online fanfiction."

"Wing kink?" Dean's gaze snapped to his brother, staring at him like he was speaking a foreign language.

"Yeah, a lot of speculation on how sensitive an angel's wings are, made for a lot of stories," Sam told him.

"True enough," Gabriel told them. "An angel's wings, especially for a soldier like Castiel, are their primary weapon, but treated properly, well," Gabriel made an explosion noise, complete with hand gestures.

"So whatever this is knows a lot about angels," Sam surmised.

"And a lot about us, too, even shit we don't talk about," Dean said, looking down.

"Like the cuddling?" Sam said with a grin.

"Shut up, bitch," Dean muttered.

"I think it's cute, jerk," Sam retorted.

"Play nice kids," Gabriel said, standing up and stretching. "Whatever this is, it's powerful enough to resurrect an archangel, pull an angel's wings into existence, can compel all of us to do shit we'd never consider, and likes fanfiction of dear old Dad's Supernatural books. I'm not normally the buzzkill in the room, but..." Gabriel shrugged his shoulders and raised his hands in a questioning motion.

"Yeah," Dean said. He looked at Sam and asked, "find anything at Chuck's?"

Sam just shook his head. "Just drafts and rewrites, nothing new and nothing about what's happening now. Are you sure he's not back in Heaven, or even lurking around?" Sam asked Gabriel.

"Pretty sure he's not, or Heaven's switchboard would be blaring at full volume." He snapped his fingers, clothing Dean. "You two check on Cassie, I'm gonna go poke a few clouds." And with another snap, Gabriel was gone.

"So," Sam said to Dean with a mischievous grin on his face, "You and Gabriel?"

"Dude, _no_." Dean stood up and threw the blanket over the back of the couch. "You and Cas?" Dean was pretty sure what the answer was when Sam started turning ten shades of red, and rather than continue the conversation, he opted to go check on their resident angel. Sam followed quietly, willing the flush to subside before they reached Cas' room.

Dean knocked twice on Castiel's door before pushing it open. When they entered, they found Cas sitting on the edge of his bed, stripped from the waist up with his wings wrapped around himself. Instead of looking up, he ducked his head lower to avert his gaze from the Winchesters' concerned looks.

"Cas?" Dean asked tentatively. "You okay buddy?" Sam slapped him in the shoulder, giving him a look that asked 'what the hell?' Dean shot him a look back that said 'what? I'm trying."

Cas sighed before pulling his wings close in to his back and turning to face Dean and Sam. "I apologize," he said, "this was unexpected and I'm not completely comfortable with it."

Sam sat down next to Cas on the bed, placing a hand on his shoulder and giving him a kind smile. "Cas, none of us are really comfortable with anything going on around here lately. You have nothing to apologize for."

Dean sat down on Cas' other side, giving him a shoulder bump and chuckling. "Yeah, and you especially don't have to apologize for your wings, dude. They're badass."

Cas sighed and hung his head again. "Not at the moment, they're not," he said weakly. "Although they're still functional, they've been severely damaged and they're very... unsightly."

"No they're not, they're awesome," Dean said emphatically.

Sam shot him a look that said 'not helping' before turning back to Castiel. "Dean and I are both covered in scars," he tried reasoning with the angel. "Do you think we're unsightly?"

Cas shook his head slightly before responding, "no."

"I still think they're awesome," Dean said, and Cas gave him a small smile.

"Is there anything we could do to help?" Sam offered. "We could straighten out some of the feathers, or... groom you?.. I guess?"

Castiel, Angel of the Lord, turned several shades of red. "That may not be the best course of action, given the current circumstances," he said cautiously. "My wings can be somewhat... sensitive... on this plane of existence, even more so in their current state." Cas sighed, picking at a stray feather that just wouldn't lie flat against the others. Finally giving up, he plucked it out with a wince.

"Ouch," Dean said, wincing along with Cas. He reached out one hand, gently massaging the spot where the offending feather was pulled from. Cas just sighed and rested his head on Dean's shoulder as the hunter continued his ministrations. "You're family, Cas. Compulsion or not I'm still willing to help where I can." He moved on from the spot he was working on to massage the bases of each feather in that row, straightening them out the best he could.

Seeing Castiel relax into Dean's touch, Sam started in on his other wing, gently moving through the feathers to put them in their place. It was slow and methodical and the repetitive actions were soothing in their own way. Cas must have found it soothing as well; he was snuggled up to Dean's side and humming in contentment. Sam inched closer, sandwiching Cas between them comfortably, dropping a few light kisses on his bare shoulder as he continued to work.

Finishing with the lower rows of feathers, Dean gently carded his fingers through them, smoothing them into place. Cas gave a little shiver and pushed his head into the crook of Dean's neck. "This okay Cas?" Dean asked softly, placing a kiss on the angel's forehead. Castiel just nodded and the boys continued their ministrations on his wings.

As an hour passed, Dean and Sam made good work of Castiel's wings, fixing the ones they could and gently removing the ones Cas said had to go, Cas becoming more and more affectionate throughout the process. When Dean finished with the feathers on his side, the wing looked significantly better and Cas seemed to feel less self-conscious about the appendages. Dean started in on Cas' back where the wing joint was attached, using firm pressure to relieve tension in the muscles there. He wasn't prepared for the pornographic moan that escaped Cas' lips, or the angel suddenly climbing into his lap and wrapping his wings around them.

"Cas?" Dean asked, startled and confused.

"Don't stop," he said, his voice breathy. He looked over his shoulder at Sam and said, "either of you," then returned his head the crook of Dean's neck.

Dean obliged by wrapping his arms around the angel's middle and reaching up to continue massaging where his wings met his back. In order to reach them, he had to pull Cas closer. Cas' ass wiggled against Dean's groin as he moved chest to chest against him, pulling a groan from Dean. With a touch of his fingers, Cas removed both his and Dean's clothes. With Cas firmly seated against Dean's dick, Dean's hips began to thrust slightly in rhythm with his stroking hands.

Sam stood and moved behind Castiel, continuing to card his fingers through the angel's wings and kissing across his bare neck and shoulders. He moved long enough to remove his shirt, then stepped back to press his bare chest against the feathers. The contact had both men gasping at the sensation, a direct line of pleasure from one man to the other. If it felt that good on his bare chest... Sam backed up once more, pulled off the rest of his clothes, then pressed back up against Castiel's wings, rutting up against them.

Sam's movements pushed Cas against Dean in a rhythmic motion, causing Dean's dick to rub against his hole and catch against the rim. He was still loose from his earlier encounter with Sam, but no way was Dean about to go in dry. He tried to get Cas' attention, but the angel was happily humping away. Dean sighed and looked over Cas' shoulder at his brother and said, "hey, Sammy, need some lube here."

Sam nodded at his brother and left to grab the lube he kept in his room. Part of him knew this was slightly fucked up, but he didn't have it in him to care. Maybe it was the compulsion, maybe it was the after-effects of what he did with Cas that morning, but _dammit_ he felt good and didn't they deserve that? Grabbing the lube from his nightstand, he went back to Cas' room.

When Sam walked back in, Dean lifted his head and reached out for the bottle. Sam shook his head and took his place again at Castiel's back. He slicked up his fingers and reached underneath the angel. He deftly worked the angel open while massaging the main joint at the top of his left wing with his other hand. At the firm pressure to the joint Castiel's back bowed, grinding further down onto Dean's lap.

"C'mon Sam, hurry the hell up," Dean growled at his brother. Sam pulled his fingers from Cas and wrapped his hand around Dean's dick, smirking when his brother whined like a little girl at his touch. When Dean got impatient and pulled back to line up with Cas' entrance, Sam started massaging Castiel's wings in earnest with both hands.

Between Sam's hands on his wings and Dean's cock in his ass, Castiel was overloaded with sensation. He ground down onto Dean's dick, his fingers in the hunter's hair as lightning bolts of pleasure skated across his nervous system. When Dean's hands made their way down to his backside to start lifting up and dropping him back down on his erection, Castiel questioned himself for not doing this before. He absolutely adored the feel of Dean inside and all around him, his touch all over his skin. He began riding Dean's dick in earnest without his help, crying out each time Dean hit deep inside him. The faster he went, the hard he thrust down, the more pleasurable the feeling. When Sam grasped a handful of his feathers and gently tugged at them, it was like an attack on his synapses lighting him up and blacking him out at the same time. Cas screamed Dean's name as he shot ropes of come across the man's chest.

Sam held Cas' body up as Dean started thrusting his hips harder into the angel, chasing his orgasm. It wasn't long before his own back was arching, a feral sound was dragged from his throat as his body buried itself as deep inside Cas as it could. Both men sated, Dean wrapped his arms around Cas and pulled him down to lie on top of him, holding him tight and breathing words of praise into his hair.

As Cas fell forward into Dean's arms, Dean slipped out of his body. Sam watched as a thin trickle of come leaked from Cas' ass. Removing one hand from Cas' wings, he reached forward and traced his rim before pushing the come back inside, causing a chain reaction of first Cas to shudder against Dean, and then Dean to shudder. Fascinated with the reaction, he continued tracing the puffy ring of muscle with his finger, occasionally dipping in, until Cas was squirming against Dean and whimpering.

Sam took himself in hand and slowly fed his cock into Cas' sloppy hole. Dean's come squished around his dick, adding to the warmth surrounding him. When he bottomed out, Cas moaned, Dean capturing the sound with his lips. Grasping the primary bones of his wings, Sam started a steady slide in and out of Castiel, using his wings to pull him back onto his cock. He watched as Dean kissed Cas deeply, swallowing the sounds the angel made and pushing his hips up in counter to Sam's own motion. Once again the pace picked up and all three participants became frantic for more friction to push them towards release. Castiel broke the kiss with Dean to yell out Sam's name as he came again, Dean following him over the edge. The tight squeeze of Castiel's ass was all it took to make Sam's hips stutter as he came into the angel, adding to his brother's load.

Sated, Sam pulled out of Castiel and smoothed down the feathers he rumpled, lulling him into a content rest against Dean's chest. When he stepped back, Cas's wings wrapped tightly around Dean and he heard both men's deep, even breathing as they fell asleep. Content with the peace they seemed to have found in each other, Sam left to shower and keep researching whatever it was that was compelling them all to act out these sexual scenes, as well as examine how much of this was the compulsion and how much was becoming real.

* * * * *

_I do love when the Winchesters take care of Cas. That angel has done so much for them and been through a hell of a lot, it just seems fitting that they show him once in a while, emotionally constipated as they all may be. But as much as I love a good threesome, Cas has always been Dean's angel, and it's about time Sam had one of his own._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK, I don't know how it happened, but I think I accidentally made Cas a cockslut. That wasn't the plan when I first started this series, but that's the story that unfolded. I'm just gonna run with it and see what the boys think ;)


	8. Rule #8: Sam Likes Having His Hair Pulled

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Gabriel enjoys the reaction he gets when he pulls Sam's hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not gonna bother with the non-con warning here, Sam definitely wants it ;)

_There was once a joke on Tumblr that if you watched Supernatural backwards, you'd get a story about a boy who got happier and happier the shorter his hair got. Not sure why Sam ever let his hair grow out so much over the years, it's just something the monster of the week can use as leverage against him in a fight. Short hair should be a must for hunters. However, a popular theory about the length of Sam's hair revolves around his enjoyment of having his hair pulled. As someone who also enjoys having their hair pulled, I am totally accepting this as headcannon._

* * * * *

Sam had been sitting at his laptop for almost four hours straight, taking advantage of the peace and quiet with Dean and Cas sleeping (or whatever they were doing, he didn't really want to know). He figured if he threw himself into figuring out what was causing all of them to act out all these fanfiction scenarios, he wouldn't have to think about when or why they stopped worrying about the compulsions and just went along with it. Once this whole thing was over they could all try going back to normal. Try being the operative word, especially with Gabriel being back.

"Hey Moose, how's Cassie?"

_Speak of the ~~devil~~ archangel._

"He's fine," Sam hedged, "sleeping it off, I think. Find anything about what the hell's going on?"

"Nope," he replied, "and neither can anyone else. Apparently, there's some sort of influx of multidimensional power. Everyone's in a tizzy."

"Multidimensional?" Sam asked. "As in, multiverse theory and parallel universes?" 

"That would be it!" Gabriel said, pointing a finger at Sam. "Now we just gotta find which ones have a Sam and Dean Winchester that teenage girls obsess over and narrow it down to the right one. Difficult, but it shouldn't be as hard as actually getting there."

"There's a spell for that," Sam said, getting up to retrieve their dad's journal.

" _Yeeaah_ ," Gabriel said with more than a little apprehension in his voice. "How do you know about it?"

For the longest time, Dean had been adding his own notes to their dad's journal. It happened long enough ago that Dean probably put an entry in for it... "Here it is," Sam said, sitting back down with the journal open in front of him. "Balthazar sent us to parallel universe once, where  _Supernatural_ was a television show. Sam and Dean Winchester weren't real, they were played by actors who looked exactly like us."

"And I'm sure they have fanfiction there too." Gabriel read over Sam's shoulder at Dean's notes, including the spell components and the incantation. As he leaned over, he could smell Sam's shampoo, something citrusy. He buried his nose in Sam's hair and took a deep breath. 

"Gabriel?" Sam asked, confused.

Gabriel reached up with both hands and threaded his fingers through Sam's hair, indulging in the silky texture. Dean may give Sam hell about the length, but it was clear Sam took care of it, and it suited him beautifully. Curiously, he closed his fingers around the strands and gave a gentle tug.

Sam's eyes closed and he quietly moaned, and Gabriel's dick perked up.

"Like that, Sammy?" Gabriel whispered playfully in his ear. He gave another gentle tug, getting another gorgeous moan out of the man.

"I, uh, yeah, I kinda do," Sam admitted quietly. He tipped his head back and let Gabriel continue playing with his hair. The archangel kept running his fingers through his hair, intermittently pulling at it and scraping his short nails along his scalp. It was a sensuous feeling, one that Sam had always loved but hadn't had the opportunity to indulge in for years. One particularly vicious tug had him whining and his dick starting to harden again, despite his earlier activities. The best things about whatever this is were the short refraction period and the libido of a teenager, Sam thought.

  
"I do like those pretty noises, Sammy," Gabriel murmured, bending over to kiss and nibble up and down the side of Sam's neck. Sam white-knuckled the armrests of the chair and moaned again. Gabriel released Sam's hair just long enough to push the table out of the way and straddle Sam's thighs. He pushed his hands back into Sam's hair, using it to pull him in for a demanding kiss. 

Sam liked kissing as much as he liked having his hair played with, and Gabriel was really, really good at it. Sam wrapped his arms around him and pulled him close, tilting his head and slotting his mouth against Gabriel's like they were made for each other. Their tongues dueled for dominance as Gabriel ground his ass into Sam's now-fully-erect cock.

"Gabriel," Sam gasped, pulling away from Gabriel's mouth after far too long without oxygen. Gabriel just gave him a lascivious grin and snapped his fingers. Their clothes ended up somewhere, Sam didn't really care where at the moment. No, at the moment he had a very hot, very naked archangel in his lap wriggling his ass against his cock. As Sam pushed up, he felt something slick along his dick, and smiled wickedly at Gabriel.

"A little anxious, Gabriel?" he said seductively.

"You lucked out with me, Sammy," Gabriel said. "Archangel/Trickster combo. Prepped and prelubed for your enjoyment."

Sam barked out a laugh, pulling the archangel up with one arm while guiding his cock into him with his free hand. Gabriel slid down easily, despite Sam's girth, and took the entire length in a shuddering moan. Gabriel's hands made it back into Sam's hair, fisting it tightly and pulling Sam's head back to attack his neck with lips, tongue, and teeth. Sam growled and started bucking his hips, setting a brutal pace.

It could have been minutes or hours, but soon enough both men were slamming into each other, panting and holding onto each other for dear life. With one last tug of Sam's hair, he said, "come on Sam, come for me," and that was it. Sam slammed his hips upward to bury himself into the archangel, head dropping back into Gabriel's hands as he came. Gabriel kept bouncing through Sam's orgasm until his own came over him, coming fast and hard between him and his hunter.

As the last tremors left their bodies, Gabriel leaned into Sam, fingers absently twirling the ends of his hair. Neither said a word, but they didn't have to because they were both thinking the same thing and they both knew it. The compulsion that time wasn't nearly as strong as it had been, and neither of them fought it. What neither of them knew, however, was how much the other wanted more.

* * * * *

_My friends think my obsession with Supernatural is starting to border on unhealthy. What little free time I have is taken up by either watching (and re-watching) episodes or reading fanfiction. They just don't seem to get how I can enjoy reading so much of what they refer to as 'gay erotica'.  Seriously, have you seen these men? How can you not want to read about them having sex?!? Especially with each other!_


	9. Rule #9: The Prostate Is A Magical Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Dean learns why Castiel enjoys being the bottom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nope, no non-con at all here. Enjoy!

_Sometimes, I'm a little bummed about not being a guy. When reading all this fanfiction ('gay erotica', whatever, shut up), there's a lot of talk about the guys getting their prostates nailed and coming untouched. I know I supposedly have a g-spot, but have never been lucky enough to have a guy been able to find it. If fanfiction were real, then the prostate is an easy target and will get you off almost every single time. Must be nice._

* * * * *

Dean was warm and comfortable. For a change, he awoke slowly, savoring the heavy feel of his limbs and the fuzziness of his mind. He pulled the blanket up closer to his chin as he tried to slip back into his delicious dreams, but it was a much thicker blanket than he'd had on his bed before. Cracking an eye open, he saw he was holding the top of Castiel's wing, which had been draped over his naked body. He rolled his head to one side to see Cas watching him, and the angel's mouth quirked up at one corner.

"Hello, Dean."

"Heya, Cas," Dean said with a smile. "How're you holding up?"

Castiel blinked. "I'm fine, and apparently Gabriel owes me a hundred dollars."

Dean laughed. "Oh yeah? Why's that?"

"He assured me you'd be having a 'big gay freak-out' when you woke up. I assured him you wouldn't."

"When was Gabriel here?" Dean asked, frowning at the thought of the asshole archangel seeing him in the midst of another cuddle puddle.

"He briefly stopped by to check on me, but then left when he saw you here with me." Castiel blinked again. "I'm pleased that you're not 'freaking out'."

"Hey, I'm not the one who's been taking it up the ass all day," Dean joked. "You sure you're okay, dude? You're not sore or anything, are you?"

Castiel gave Dean a sincere smile. "I'm fine, Dean. I appreciate your concern, but not only has my graced healed any minor aches caused by the amount of intercourse I've had today, I've thoroughly enjoyed myself and find myself hoping for more."

That surprised Dean. Cas had given them the whole 'angels don't have a gender' speech before, but his vessel was male. Surely he couldn't enjoy catching instead of pitching _that much_.

"Score one for angel mojo," Dean quipped. "As soon as this is all over, you won't have to worry about any of this anymore. Your ass will be safe," he chuckled at his own pun.

Castiel gave Dean one of his confused puppy faces. "I don't want my ass to be 'safe', Dean. I would like to continue this even after we handle whatever entity has created this situation. If you're not interested, I will simply find someone else."

Dean was struck dumb by Cas' declaration. " _Why?_ " was all he could think to say.

Castiel just sighed. "Because I enjoy it. As you haven't been on the receiving end, I doubt you would understand. The prostate is a magical thing. Had I known how stimulating it would affect the rest of my body, I may have tried this when I was human and started feeling things like this."

Dean simply couldn't wrap his head around it. He knew how big his and Sam's (unfortunately) dicks were, and cramming them into a small opening like that couldn't be comfortable, let alone pleasurable. He'd assumed Cas was just going along with all of this because of the compulsion, acting like he enjoyed it for his and Sam's benefits. _And why did thinking of Cas with someone else make his chest hurt?_

"Would you allow me to show you what I'm talking about?" Cas asked Dean seriously.

"No way, dude," Dean said making a face.

Castiel just sat up and shrugged. "If that's your choice, Dean. I'll just go find Sam and see if he has paired up with Gabriel or not. He may be amenable to 'hooking up', and he is very well endowed."

At the mention of Cas hooking up with his brother, Dean's sanity flew right out the window.

"Okay, okay!" he said quickly, a hand reaching out to stop Cas from leaving the room. "What do you want me to do?"

Castiel gave a smug smile and sat back down next to Dean on the bed, tucking his wings behind him. He grabbed the bottle of lube from where Sam left it on the nightstand. He lay down next to Dean, tucking into his side, and placed the lube bottle between them to let their body heat warm it up. He snaked one arm under Dean's head and let his other hand trail up and down Dean's bare skin, goosebumps popping up under his touch. Castiel enjoyed Dean's reaction to him, and seeking out more he reached down to cup Dean's balls in his hand, gently fondling them while his thumb lightly brushed against the base of his cock.

Dean closed his eyes and forced himself to relax. Cas' touch was nice, soothing even. Eventually, Cas' fingers slid behind his balls, massaging the area just behind them with firm pressure. It felt good. Good enough that his dick was twitching and filling. A small sigh escaped his lips and his body relaxed even further into Castiel's. Without warning, he felt Cas' lips on his. It made Dean tense up again for a second, then relaxed as the angel continued to simply brush his lips against Dean's, no pushing for anything more than that.

Cas slowly became more persistent. The arm behind Dean's head pulled them closer together, and Cas' tongue poked out to lick along Dean's lips. The hand between Dean's legs were slowly working their way further back, his fingers tracing lightly along his crack. Dean shivered at that, and felt Cas smile against his mouth. He couldn't help smiling back, knowing that Castiel was actually happy and enjoying himself, enjoying _Dean_. Dean tentatively moved his hand and stroked Cas' dick with his knuckles, finding the angel already fully erect. He twisted his wrist so he could palm Cas' erection, pulling a small gasp from him. Now Dean smiled back and started stroking Cas' dick like he meant it.

Castiel reached up and removed Dean's hand from his dick. "Just relax, Dean," he said sweetly, "this is for you. Pay attention." Dean just nodded and let Cas continue. Putting a dollop of lube on his fingers, Cas' other hand reached back even further, parting Dean's cheeks and lightly touching his hole. The action made Dean shiver in both apprehension and anticipation. Cas slowly massaged the furled muscle, relaxing Dean. It wasn't an unpleasant feeling, and soon he was pushing into the touch.

The tip of one of Cas' fingers gently pushed into Dean's ass, startling the man. The angel just shushed him and kissed him to distraction. Dean focused on Cas' mouth rather than his finger and felt himself drifting into the touch. The foreign intrusion became less of an annoyance and more of a pleasure as Cas worked his way in to the first knuckle, then the second. By the time he slid the digit all the way in, Dean was panting.

The second finger took Dean by surprise and he almost tensed up again, but Cas was kissing him and stroking his body into relaxation. The burn and stretch went from uncomfortable to wonderful in no time flat. For a moment it felt like Cas is rooting around inside him, looking for something, before a jolt of white hot ecstasy shoots up his spine, bowing his back and ripping a cry from his throat. _Holy shit what the everloving fuck was that?!?_

Castiel chuckled darkly, and with a grin he said, " _that_ , Dean, is your prostate." Fingers deep inside Dean, he gently rubbed at the bundle of nerves, alternating pressure to test the various inhuman sounds he could pull from the man. Dean tried to move his hips against Cas' hand, but Cas held him firmly to the bed with his angelic strength. Cas slowly increased the pressure and speed until Dean's dick was leaking a steady stream of precome and tears were streaming down his face, begging for release.

In one deft movement, Castiel was on top of him, pulling his hips up and putting Dean's legs over his shoulders. He stroked his lubed hand over his cock twice before lining up and slowly pushing in, aiming for and hitting Dean's prostate. Dean's mind whited out to everything but the pleasure as Cas steadily hit his prostate on _every. single. stroke._ Even though Cas wasn't thrusting into him particularly hard or fast, Dean felt his orgasm building incredibly fast. He was so close. _Sooo close._

When Cas snapped his hips brutally just once, Dean was done. He was screaming and coming harder than he ever had in his life. Cas sped up and fucked him fast and hard through it, prolonging the feeling of electricity dancing along every nerve in his body until he blacked out from the pleasure. He came to a couple minutes later, Cas bracing himself on arms to each side of Dean's head and a genuine smile gracing his lips.

"Now do you understand why I wish for this to continue, Dean?" Cas asked when Dean's eyes fluttered open.

"Yeah," Dean said on a ragged breath. "C'mere," he mumbled, pulling Cas down on top of him and wrapping his arms around him before rolling them to their side. "Tell ya what, we can talk about it when I have a few more brain cells to work with, okay?"

Cas pecked a kiss on Dean's lips and said with a smile, "That would make me very happy, Dean."

* * * * *

_I think what I like best about fanfiction is that we can write our own happy endings for characters we love so much. Don't get me wrong, the writers are good, really good, but they're not giving us what we want fast enough (see: 'gay erotica'). We can also put them in scenarios that are totally out of character for them, just to see what happens or to satisfy our own kinks and fetishes. Sometimes we just want to put them in scenarios that make them happy. Sometimes, we just want them to be loud._


	10. Rule #10: No One Can Be Quiet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a little sibling rivalry makes everyone happy (and loud).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No non-con warning, the boys are definitely consensual at this stage of the game. Enjoy the shameless smut!

_So I have two younger brothers. They're both little shits but I love them dearly. I imagine that Dean feels the same way about Sam. Sometimes I wonder if, like my brothers & I, sibling rivalry gets the better of them sometimes._

* * * * *  
When Dean and Castiel finally stumbled out of Cas' room, they found Sam sitting in Gabriel's lap as they worked with Sam's laptop and stacks of books covering the map table. The two seemed to be engrossed in whatever Gabriel was scratching out onto a legal pad and hadn't heard the other two enter the room.

"Well, doesn't this look cozy?" Dean said loudly, startling the two at the table. Sam jumped up, red-faced with embarrassment, while Gabriel stood languidly with a smirk on his face.

"Well, look who decided to join the land of the living," Gabriel snarked back, although it didn't have the same effect on Dean or Castiel as Dean's jibe at Sam had had.

Castiel sighed. "Did you find anything, Gabriel?" he asked, exasperated at Dean and Gabriel's attitudes towards each other.

Sam stood up with their dad's journal in one hand and the legal pad in the other. "Remember a few years back when Balthazar sent us to that alternate universe where our lives were a television show?" he asked his brother. Dean just snorted in the affirmative and crossed his arms over his chest. "Well, it looks like whatever this is resides in a similar universe, one where the actor who played Cas wasn't killed by an angelic hitman. In that universe, _Supernatural_ has been on the air for twelve seasons, with Dean, Sam, Cas, and-get this- _Crowley_ are the lead characters on the show."

"Same actors?" Dean asked curiously. He really hoped the guy who played him in this universe wasn't a soap star like the other one.

"Yep," Gabriel said with a grin. "Jensen Ackles, Soap Star Extraordinaire. He also played in some movie called _Ten Inch Hero_ as a punk with piercings and colored hair." He turned the laptop around to show Dean pictures that only vaguely resembled himself. "It's a good look on you," Gabriel said with a wink, referring to the picture with a blue mohawk, muttonchop sideburns, a nose ring, a labret under his lip, and a t-shirt that said _Orgasm Donor_.

"Yeah, no thanks," Dean said. "How'd you get those, anyway?"

" _Helllooooo_ ," Gabriel said, pointing at himself. " _Archangel_." Sam stifled a laugh at that, which earned him a look from Dean.

"And I bet you're still played by that Polish guy," Dean said, nodding at Sam. "What about these two?" he asked, pointing at Castiel and Gabriel.

"Cas is played by a just as annoying version of Misha Collins, and Gabriel is played by a D-list actor named Richard Speight Jr. His claim to fame seems to be hosting _Supernatural_ conventions with the guy who plays Chuck on the show." Cas frowned, and Gabriel scoffed, muttering something about " _I'll show you the D-list_ ," under his breath. Both reactions made Dean chuckle.

"So, what? Do we have a god or something that gets a hard-on from bad fanfiction?" Dean asked, frowning. "That's gotta be the only thing with enough juice to make us do this shit from another universe."

"I think it stopped making us do shit a while ago," Sam muttered.

Dean whipped his head to glare at his brother, narrowing his eyes. "What did you say?" he demanded through clenched teeth.

Sam stared his brother dead in the eye and very evenly said, "you heard me. More to the point, we heard you. Sounded pretty damned consensual to me."

Dean pointed at his brother angrily and said, " _you_ sounded consensual," his retort falling flat. "At least I know I can satisfy Cas. Bet shortstack over there is barely getting his rocks off."

"Oh really? Because I distinctly remember him telling me that I was more endowed than you," Sam shot back.

"I also said I preferred having intercourse with Dean," Castiel said primly, still frowning. "Size is not a substitute for skill." Dean grinned smugly as Sam's jaw dropped.

"And what would you know about skill, Cassie? _Hmmmmmm?_ " Gabriel asked, sounding more like a trickster than an archangel. " _You're_ the thousand-year-old virgin around here." Gabriel stepped back and looped an arm around Sam's waist, tugging him close. "Sammy's got the size  _and_ the skill, _thankyouverymuch_. Best lay I've had in a few millennia myself." Sam grinned proudly at that, throwing his arm over Gabriel's shoulder and grinning just as smugly as Dean, who was now turning several angry shades of red.

"Double or nothing, asshole," Dean spat at Gabriel. "You bet Cas I'd have some big gay freakout, and I didn't." Sam snorted and muttered "told ya" under his breath at Gabriel. Dean continued.

"Double or nothing that I can fuck Cas better than Sam can fuck you."

Sam rolled his eyes. "Oh, please. How the hell are we supposed to determine who wins that one?"

Dean smirked, oddly similar to Gabriel's trickster smile. "I don't know about Gabe, but I know Cas can get pretty loud."

Before Sam could say anything, Gabriel put a hand on his chest to stop him. Turning towards Dean he pointed and said," you're on." He then turned to Castiel and pointed at him. "No faking it, and no mojo. Understood?" When Cas nodded, Gabriel snapped his fingers, instantly undressing both himself and Castiel and bending them over the map table, asses out. A bottle of lube sat on the table next to each angel. "May the best human win," he said. "And no whining when he does, Deano," he quipped.

Dean was the first one to step up to the challenge, standing behind Cas and leaning over him. He placed a short kiss to his temple and whispered, "prostate?" Cas nodded and the two shared a knowing smile. Dean lubed up a couple fingers and easily worked them into Cas' tight hole. Dean was amazed that he was so tight after all the poundings the guy had taken recently. Score another point for angel mojo. He felt around as he loosened Cas up, the angel letting out a porno-worthy moan when Dean found his prostate.

Sam took Cas' moan as a challenge, taking his place behind Gabriel. He didn't even bother with the lube, knowing that the archangel was still sloppy from earlier. Looking straight at Dean he unzipped his jeans, pulled his erection out, and in one quick move buried himself to the hilt in Gabriel's ass, making the archangel scream.

"No powers, Gabriel," Cas panted as Dean worked him open.

"None used, bro," Gabriel breathed out. "I'm not the kind of prude who needs to clean up every time. I _like_ having the reminder there." He winked Castiel and groaned louder as Sam continued his assault.

Dean frowned at his brother and the archangel. He pulled his own raging erection from his jeans and lined up to Cas' abused hole. He pushed in slower, more carefully, than Sam had done with Gabriel. He may be pissed, but he cared more about Cas than this stupid bet. He started a slow rhythm, trying not to hurt the angel underneath him, but Castiel was having none of that. He angled his hips up and pushed back onto Dean so that Dean's dick hit his prostate. That found, Cas started slamming back onto Dean, Dean picking up and matching him thrust for thrust, the normally stoic angel wailing.

The sounds of skin on skin were soon drowned out by the crescendos of the angels' moans and cries. Castiel and Gabriel took everything the Winchesters gave them. Neither Sam nor Dean were quiet, either, thoroughly enjoying fucking into their angels' hot bodies. Dean grasped Cas' hips and started pulling him into each thrust, desperate to make Cas come before he lost his own battle. Another few thrusts and Cas' head snapped back as he came, yelling loud enough to rattle the glass in the room.

Sam faltered, shocked by the sounds that Cas was making under his brother. Gabriel reached back and grabbed onto Sam's thighs, pulling him into each thrust. "Almost there, Sammy," he gasped, and Sam started pounding into Gabriel again with renewed vigor. Sam tipped over the edge as Gabriel's ass started squeezing his cock and the two came loudly, almost simultaneously.

As everyone came down from their highs and they started to regain their breath, Dean panted out a "so?"

Sam took a few more gulps of air before he replied with a one-shoulder shrug, "sounds like a tie." Dean snorted and said, "sounds like something is still making us do shit."

Cas' rested his forehead on the table and concurred. "Dean is correct. While you two engage in 'prank wars' and other forms of sibling rivalry, this is not the kind of act either of you would engage in voluntarily.

Gabriel looked over at Sam, who was now turning several shades of red in embarrassment. He nodded at Gabriel, who weakly snapped his fingers and immediately everyone was cleaned up, dressed, and sitting at the table.

"We got the spell," Sam said, breathing normal but his heart still racing. "I'm sure we have the ingredients down in the storeroom. We'll grab those and get this over with."

"The sooner, the better," Dean agreed.

* * * * *

_I understand there are things that are never gonna happen on the show. While I hold out hope for Destiel, I've accepted that unless the writers bring Gabriel back, there's no hope whatsoever for Sabriel. Except in fanfiction. After all, fanfiction is where we can make all our most depraved fantasies come true._


	11. Rule #11: Who Doesn't Love A Good Sex Pollen or Fuck- Or-Die Spell?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Dean is a klutz and an orgy ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Throwing in a minor non-con warning, because sex pollen/fuck-or-die, and the reader's perception of compulsion. Otherwise, enjoy the shenanigans!

_When I have an especially trying day, I hop online and look up Team Free Love stories. Why? Because nothing cheers me up more than four hot guys lovin' on each other, that's why._

* * * * *

"All we need is salt, blood of a lamb, and a bone from a lesser saint," Sam told Dean, Castiel, and Gabriel. The four of them split up, searching the storeroom for the lamb's blood and the bone; they have plenty of salt in the cupboards upstairs. Castiel was the first one to find success, locating a finger bone from Saint Fiacre. Gabriel giggled at that, earning him odd looks from Sam and Dean, who continued to look for the lamb's blood.

While Sam was seriously looking, Dean was more into exploring the weirdness they had contained in the room. Half the stuff wasn't even labeled, so he entertained himself by making up names for everything, despite not knowing what the hell he was even looking at. One corked bottle looked like a snow globe, the white at the bottom slightly sparkly. He picked it up and shook it, and the white snowflakes changed color before his eyes. "Cool," he said to no one in particular.

"Hey Gabriel," Sam called out, "I'm not finding lamb's blood, but this one is marked _ewe's m. blood_. Will it work?"

They all met up near the door, Castiel holding the finger bone, Sam holding the jar of blood, and Dean smiling at his snow globe.

"Hey guys," Dean said with a grin, "check this shit out." He held the jar with his fingers on the bottom and his thumb on the top because _duh, I don't want to accidentally uncork it_ , and shook it for the others to see.

" _DEAN!_ " Gabriel yelled, just as Dean's thumb accidentally pushed the cork into the bottle. The liquid almost instantly evaporated and the particles puffed out of the bottle as soon as the cork hit it. Sam and Castiel both dropped what they were holding in order to wave the particles away from them. The glass jar holding the blood shattered, the saint's bone landing in it. Just as Gabriel yelled " _EVERYBODY OUT!_ " the pollen landed on the blood, causing a wet, sticky explosion followed by a flash of light. Gabriel continued herding everyone out of the room and shut the door behind them, but it was too late.

"You idiots!" Gabriel yelled, trying to wipe the viscous liquid from his face. "Don't let it get in your mouth or eyes!"

Castiel spit and said, "I believe it is a little late for that." Sam and Dean stripped off their flannels and rubbed at their mouths with their clean t-shirts, but their eyes were already stinging.

"What the hell did you do, Dean," Sam demanded. Dean looked pissy, but not repentant.

"That was magically corrupted _Vitex agnus_ ," Gabriel explained, "that's why it was in a suspension. It was used to calm sexual appetites. Or in this case, enhance them."

Dean mumbled what could have been an apology, but it was cut short by Sam's bitchface.

"Okay, so sex pollen," Sam said. "Can we neutralize it?"

"Oh, if _only_ it were sex pollen!" Gabriel rolled his eyes, trying and failing to snap away the gunk.

" _M. blood_ refers to menstrual blood. And Saint Fiacre? Patron saint of gardeners, cabbies, and people with STDs."

"There's a patron saint for that?" Dean asked incredulously, which earned him yet another bitchface from his brother. He shrugged it off. "Dude, I just thought it looked cool. I didn't know we had the ingredients for a sex spell."

"Oh, if _only_ it were a sex spell!" Gabriel rolled his eyes. "Okay, who had membrane contact and who ingested it?"

"I believe I ingested a small amount," Castiel said in his normal monotone voice. However, he seemed to be fidgeting where he stood.

"You two-just your eyes, or did you get any in your mouths?" Gabriel started moving them down the hall to the communal showers as he talked."Just the eyes," Sam said.

"I don't think I got any in my mouth," Dean said, clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth, "but I think I got some of the pollen in there. Does that count?"

"What do you think, moron?" Gabriel sniped as he pushed everyone through the door.

Dean got right up in Gabriel's face and growled, "who are you calling a moron, pipsqueak?"

" _You_ , you moron!" Gabriel grabbed Dean's face in both hands and shoved his tongue down his throat. Sam just stared and Castiel whimpered. When Gabriel _finally_ came up for air, he told them all, "Not only are we gonna wanna fuck each other's brains out, if we don't neutralize this shit with each other's love juice, we're all gonna die. YOU. MORON."

Dean blinked at Gabriel, speechless. Then he grabbed him by the shoulders and slammed him against the tile in the nearest stall. "Clothes. Off. Now." With a snap, everyone was naked. Dean pressed his body against Gabriel's and kissed him hard. Sam started turning on shower heads and grabbing washcloths to get the sticky goo off off his skin before he assaulted someone, and not in a good way. Or maybe in a good way, depending on perception. Cas' squirmy ass was looking mighty fine right about now.

Without preamble, Sam grabbed Cas and pushed him face-first against the shower wall under one of the shower heads. One hand started working the goop out of Cas' wings, while his other hand slipped between his cheeks to start working his ass open. "Gabe," Sam said, warning tone in his voice, "we're gonna need lube." Another snap and there was a convenient dispenser on the wall. Sam gave a feral grin and said, "that's staying when this is all over." He pumped a few dollops into his hand, smeared it across his fingers, and pushed two fingers deeply into Cas, making the angel moan.

Dean wrapped a hand around Gabriel's dick and swore. "Heads up pipsqueak," Dean said, biting Gabriel's neck, "if I can't fit that monster in my mouth, you're not sticking it in my ass." Gabriel laughed until Dean took one nipple into his mouth and bit down hard. One hand made its way into Dean's hair, pushing him to his knees. As Dean took the tip of Gabriel's cock into his mouth, Gabriel reached out and took Cas' hand. He tugged Cas close enough to give him a sloppy kiss, licking at the inside of his mouth. Both brothers groaned at the sight of the angels liplocked.

Castiel, Angel of the Lord, broke the kiss with the Herald of the Lord, and said breathlessly, "Fuck me, Gabriel," and the Herald replied, "Hallelujah!" Gabriel pushed Dean and Sam out of the way and stood behind Castiel. Grabbing onto his wings, he forced his dick in with one thrust, Castiel screaming so loud his true voice cracked several mirrors.

"Shit," Dean and Sam softly swore at the same time. Sam took Dean's hand in his and helped him up. They just stood together and watched Gabriel's monster cock ream Cas' ass, impressed with Cas' ability to take something that fucking big. "That is both disturbing and hot as fuck," Sam said, leaning into Dean and running his lips across his brother's shoulders. "Think it's the spell or the compulsion?"

"Probably both," Dean said, turning his face towards Sam's. "It's also cheesier than any porn I've ever seen, and that's saying something." Dean nosed along Sam's jaw, nipping at the soft skin. Sam actually whined, grinding his throbbing erection against Dean's leg. Dean shuddered and felt the need to come rise fast inside him. "We've got two options, Sammy," Dean tried to explain, despite Sam quickly losing the battle to fuck his brother against the shower wall. "We can either fuck each other, or get in on that action," he said, waving a hand towards the angels.

Sam couldn't stop humping Dean and was about to manhandle him into position to fuck him when Gabriel grabbed his hand and yanked him over. "C'mon, Sammy," Gabriel ordered, "ride my ass. Better than Dean's-half the guilt and twice the fu- _ooooooh_!" Sam shut Gabriel up by ramming into Gabriel's ass. Gabriel lost his rhythm for a moment, making Cas whine, but soon found a push/pull where he got more than enough friction from both men.

Dean watched with his hand wrapped around his dick. He felt as though he were touch-starved and crawling out of his skin. If he didn't fit himself in there somewhere he was gonna die, figuratively and literally. With a little maneuvering, he pressed himself up against the wall by Cas and slid down, getting on his knees between the angel and the wall. It took him a minute to get Cas' dick in his mouth, considering the force of both Gabriel's and Sam's thrusts, and when he finally managed it he was seeing stars from his head hitting the wall. Castiel reached down with one hand to cup Dean's head to prevent further injury.

The strange tableau continued as hands scrabbled for purchase and orgasms were chased. Dean and Gabriel's hands twined on Castiel's hips while Sam reached over Gabriel's arms to pull at Cas' wings. When the first feather came out, Cas locked up and howled, shooting come down Dean's throats and his ass clamping down on Gabriel's cock. That started the chain reaction, the pressure pulling Gabriel's orgasm from him and his ass setting off Sam's. Dean fairly gagged with the  
weight of the men bearing down on Cas and pushing his dick down Dean's throat.

As Sam, Gabriel, and Cas stumbled back to catch their breath, Dean sat on his haunches jacking his cock as fast as he could, but there was no relief in sight. Castiel dragged Dean to his feet and dropped to his own knees, taking Dean's angry red erection into his mouth. Dean vibrated with pleasure as he threaded his fingers into Cas' hair and fucked his face until he too was screaming his release.

Completely spent and feeling as back to normal as they could in this situation, they all sat on the shower floor and let the water run over them, errantly rinsing off the last of the goo. Even after they were all clean, they all just sat there recovering from whatever the hell just happened.

"We never speak of this again," Dean said.

"Then quit being an overgrown child and playing with shit," Gabriel snarked. Dean just rolled his eyes at that.

"I think whatever's been fucking with us knew about Dean's tendency to play with things and set that up," Sam pondered out loud. "Lots of Team Free Love fanfiction out there."

"Team Free Love?" Dean asked.

"Yeah, that's what they called it when we all had sex together."

"What the hell kind of people enjoy this shit?" Dean stood on wobbly legs, hand braced on the wall. "You know what? I don't even wannna know. Let's just get the shit, do the spell, and go take care of this shit."

They all agreed with Dean's sentiment and slowly proceeded to get their asses in gear. It was time to end all of this.

* * * * *

_Team Free Love for the win! I love all our boys and love reading about them loving on each other. But if I had my say, I'd rather have any of them loving on me. One snarky archangel in particular._


	12. Rule #12: Blatant Misuse of Angelic Powers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the boys find the source of their troubles and have absolutely no clue how to deal with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nope, absolutely no non-con here!

_December 17th, a day that will live in infamy. Why? Because that's the day I was born. Number seven out of nine kids and the black sheep. Also the shortest, the smartest (well, highest IQ anyways), and in my opinion the one with the most common sense and the most imagination. Only one of the bunch who likes Star Trek, only one in the bunch who's a total fangirl (my younger brother is a sports guy to the same level of my fangirling, so it almost counts). I'm a mom, too. I have four pretty awesome kids, and have taken them to conventions and stuff whenever possible. They each have their own fandoms they follow but all in all we're pretty chill. Today marks another trip around the sun for me-39 years on this planet. We're planning on hitting Fowlers for karaoke later (the only place I can take minors to sing), but at the moment, strange shit is going on._

* * * * *

Dean, Sam, Castiel, and Gabriel had finally gathered the correct ingredients for the spell to dimension-hop. Gabriel did the sigil and activated it, insisting that he had the mojo to get them exactly where they needed to be. Slapping his open palm on the sigil he'd painted on the door, it glowed. He opened the door, all four stepping through to wherever the hell they would end up, unsure of what they would find but pretty sure it wasn't going to be good.

They were in a small, cluttered apartment. To the left was a large television with multiple game consoles hooked up, games left out around the front of it. The wall to the right was covered in framed photos; they all held the same five people, but no one picture had all five of them in one shot. One had a woman with two small children standing together in red Star Trek uniforms. Another had three children together, and still another had two, showing the children when they were very young. One picture had the woman with the two smaller children and a very tall young man hugging in a restaurant. Then there were numerous pictures of the woman with various actors, mainly from Star Trek, but one that stood out had the woman standing next to a man who  
looked like Gabriel.

"Guy looks like a douche," Dean muttered, earning him a frown from Gabriel, and he shut the door loudly behind them. They all turned to him with a _what the hell?_ look, and Dean just shrugged.

"I thought you brats were going to the movies," they heard a feminine voice from another room call out. A door to their right opened and a very short woman stepped out. She was just wearing black underwear and a black t-shirt with an anti-possession symbol on it that said _Saving People, Hunting Things, The Family Business_. Her long brown hair was pulled up in a high ponytail and there were purple-framed glasses perched on her nose, partially obscuring a smattering of freckles across her cheeks. There were words tattooed around her left wrist, but they couldn't read it from where they were standing. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the four of them standing in the entryway.

"Um, hi," Sam said with a wave. Dean rolled his eyes.

"Not that I'm complaining," the woman said, her voice shaking slightly, "but what the hell?"

"This isn't what it looks like," Dean said, stepping towards the woman with his hands up defensively.

"So I _don't_ have some of my favorite actors standing in my apartment?" she said a little more confidently. She crossed her arms over her chest and cocked a hip out, giving Dean a skeptical look. "Shouldn't you be at home with Danneel? The woman just had twins; if it were me you'd be elbows-deep in dirty diapers with me."

Sam, Castiel, and Gabriel turned to stare at Dean, who just stammered, "tw-twins?" Sam snorted in amusement at the look on his brother's face.

The woman turned on Sam and started in on him. "And leaving Gen at home with two rambunctious toddlers when she's six months pregnant? Not cool, dude." This time Sam started stammering, but couldn't get anything out. Dean smirked and said, "still with fake Ruby?" The woman laughed at that comment. "So we're going _French Mistake_ , are we? You're not Jensen, Jared, Misha, and Rich, you're Dean, Sam, Cas, and Gabriel?" They couldn't tell if she was more amused or pissed at this point.

"Let's try this from the top, shall we?" Gabriel asked, stepping forward and taking the woman's hands in his. That touch told him that she wasn't evil, wasn't a monster, but there was something powerful about her. "What's your name, sweetheart?"

"Deanna," she replied, almost leaning into Gabriel. "I'm the one who's been tweeting you guys about coming to my birthday party tonight. How'd you guys get my home address? I only mentioned where the party was gonna be."

"Not important," Gabriel said nonchalantly. "Tell me, how into fanfiction are you?"

Deanna dropped her face to stare at the floor and hide the rising color in her cheeks. "I write some. Keeps me out of trouble."

"You get into trouble a lot?" Sam asked gently. She responded with a one-shoulder shrug.

"Where do you do your writing at?" Gabriel asked, lifting her chin with one finger to get her to look at him.

"My room," she replied. "No room anywhere else for my computer desk. Broke-ass single mom, couldn't afford anything bigger."

"Hey, that's okay," Gabriel said with a smile. "Can you show us?"

She nodded and led them to the door she'd come from. The majority of the room was taken up by a queen-sized bed with a large dark-stained headboard. There was a matching bookshelf in one corner filled with books and Pop Vinyl figures. The other side of the room had a matching dresser with a large mirror on it. There were strands of ivy threaded with LED lights draped over the mirror's frame, a scarf with sigils covering the top. It was littered with candles, various plants, glass globes, and other objects from nature. A small disc with a triple moon sat in the middle. The computer table was tucked into a corner behind the door.

"This is a sacred space," Castiel said quietly, yet loud enough for all to hear.

"Great," Dean said sarcastically, "a witch."

"Hey!" Deanna said, snapping her fingers and pointing at him. " _Wiccan_. Only my kids get to call me a witch."

Gabriel laughed at that, until he turned to Deanna. His laughter died as he was finally able to truly observe her soul. "Cas," he said, never taking his eyes off her. Cas looked at Deanna with his angelic sight and tilted his head in confusion.

"What?" Dean asked impatiently. "What's going on?"

"Her soul's been ripped to shreds," Cas informed them, Deanna's eyes going wide at his pronouncement.

Gabriel cupped her face in his hands and lifted her eyes to his. "What happened to you, sweetheart?"

With fierce determination, Deanna pushed Gabriel's hands away and stepped back. "What the hell is going on?" she demanded.

Sam tried explaining as gently as he could, despite how insane it sounded. "We're the real Sam and Dean, and Cas and Gabriel. We're from a parallel universe. We don't know how or why it happened, but we think everything you've been writing about us has been affecting us."

Deanna stared at them like they were insane. "What are you smoking and why aren't you sharing?"

"Listen to this," Dean said, lifting a legal pad off Deanna's desk. "'Things I learned from fanfiction. Celestial beings don't have gag reflexes, Gabriel didn't choose his vessel for its height, Dean is a cuddler, Sam likes having his hair pulled.' It's basically a road map for everything that's happened the past few days." He handed the legal pad to Sam for him to look over. "You know we're brothers, right?" Dean asked her.

"You're fictional characters, and you're hot," she said with a grin.

"So, what? You get off on gay porn?" Dean was getting angry now. This woman had fucked with their lives and didn't seem to get it. "Why don't you go out and get laid instead of just writing about it?"

Her grin dropped. Deanna looked at her feet again and mumbled, "writing about it is safer than doing it."

The guys really didn't know what to say to that. Gabriel took her hand, sat on the edge of her bed and pulled her down next to him. "What happened?" he asked her again.

"You're nuts if you think I'm gonna just spill my life story to a few celebrities playing at their onscreen characters." she said with a huff.

Gabriel grinned at her, then raised his fingers and snapped. The overhead light went out; all the candles around her room lit up, as well as the LEDs in the ivy. All of the clutter around her room was gone. All the laundry was in a basket in the corner instead of strewn around the room, and the sheets on her bed had gone from the cream microfiber to a deep red satin. One more snap and her bluetooth speaker came on playing her favorite cello music.

"Holy shit," Deanna whispered, looking around. When she looked back at Gabriel, he was wearing an _I told you so_ shit-eating grin. "Gabriel?"

"In the flesh!" He swung his arms wide with a flourish.

"Sam? Dean?" She asked, looking at them, their responses were all wide smiles and nods. 

"Cas?"

Castiel responded by sitting on her other side and placing a hand on her shoulder. "Tell us what happened, Deanna," he said gently.

Deanna proceeded to tell them about her life, fun and crazy adventures and proud achievements peppered with stories of abuse, rape, and in some instances outright torture. She was a free spirit beaten down emotionally by her own family and physically by men. Even her own children knew what buttons to push and used that against her to hurt her when they weren't happy with her. She became a woman who trusted no one, no matter how badly she wanted to, but still never lost hope.

"I'm surprised you're still sane after all that," Sam said quietly.

Deanna just laughed. "Am I really? I'm sitting in my bedroom with fictional characters who claim to be real and from an alternate reality. I think what sanity I had left is slipping fast."

"You're not insane," Castiel told her, still gripping her shoulder. "I believe that your immersion in fantasy in order to protect yourself, combined with your complete faith in the characters you clearly love, has powered the fragments of your soul and allowed them to slip between realities. That's how you have been able to affect us."

"Got it in one, Cassie!" Gabriel said with a cheeky smile.

"So she writes to de-stress," Dean said, trying to wrap his head around everything. "How do we keep it from making us fuck each other's brains out?" He turned to Deanna. "You don't deserve to keep hurting, and I get that writing helps you, but I really don't wanna keep having sex with Gabriel or my brother."

Deanna grinned at his phrasing. "So Destiel is cannon?" she said hopefully.

Dean looked at Cas, who looked at him with a half-smile on his face. "Maybe not in your world, but in ours? I think we're gonna give it a shot." Everyone laughed when Deanna gave a little squeal of joy.

"And what about Sabriel?" she asked.

Gabriel looked at Sam and winked, then turned back to Deanna. "Maybe eventually, but we have other things to worry about first. We gotta put your soul back together so the pieces don't slip through realities."

Deanna frowned. "I don't think that's possible."

"Of course it is! And the answer is on your list!" Gabriel grinned, pointing at the legal pad. He  
snapped his fingers and Dean, Sam, and Castiel were gone. "One last story, one last item on your  
list. Blatant misuse of angelic powers. What do you say?"

Deanna grinned back. "I can try."

Gabriel waggled his eyebrows at her, then wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close. "I'm your favorite anyways, right?"

Deanna climbed up on Gabriel's lap, straddling his legs and wrapping her arms around his neck. "You have no idea," she said with a grin.

Gabriel laughed and said, "then let the healing begin!" He snapped his fingers and both of their clothes were gone. It had been years since Deanna had been skin-to-skin with anyone, and the sensation made her moan and melt into Gabriel's embrace. Hands threading into each other's hair, they pulled each other in for a kiss. Deanna blissfully explored Gabriel's mouth with her tongue, Gabriel's own teasing and dueling with hers.

All of a sudden, Gabriel stopped and pulled back, head cocked to one side. "Is that AC/DC's  _Thunderstruck_? On _cellos_?" he asked incredulously, listening to the music coming from the speaker on Deanna's nightstand.

Deanna grinned bashfully. "What can I say? I'm weird."

Gabriel smiled wide. "I like it," he said with a snap, cranking the music. He flipped Deanna over onto the bed and ground his body into hers, mouth trailing down her neck in sharp nips and soothing flicks of the tongue and she wrapped her body around his. Her lips found his neck in return, sucking small marks up the smooth, pale column of flesh and her short fingernails scritched across the muscular planes of his back. Another quick snap of Gabriel's fingers and Deanna's back arched, his grace zinging down her spine and pooling between her thighs. The feeling only intensified when Gabriel captured one nipple between his teeth, holding it there while flicking his tongue across the tip. His other hand reached down between her legs, and when his fingers slid  
easily between her slick folds they both moaned.

"I really am your favorite, aren't I?" Gabriel asked playfully, quickly nipping at her other nipple, making her squirm.

"Do you have to ask?" Deanna groaned, reaching up and pulling Gabriel into another searing kiss. "You're my guardian angel," she breathed into his mouth as they parted. Gabriel smiled sweetly against her lips and snapped his fingers again. Another wave of pleasure washed over her, and when her hips bucked he easily slid his dick inside her and making her cry out, " _oh my Chuck!_ "

Gabriel pulled his head back to stare at her. " _Oh my Chuck?_ Really?!?"

"Shut up, it's a thing here," Deanna said with a laugh. "Get on with the healing already!"

"Yes, ma'am!" Gabriel replied playfully, rocking his hips against hers and once again rendering her speechless. As the music changed to a mashup of Beethoven and Led Zeppelin and the tempo picked up, Gabriel hauled them into a sitting position. He wrapped his arms around her, hands coming up from behind and hands grasping her shoulders to pull her down onto his cock with every thrust. Deanna just wrapped her arms around his neck, letting her head fall back and enjoying the ride. Gabriel leaned into her as he pounded up into her, sucking bruises into her skin. Another snap of his fingers held her body in place so he was free to let his hands do as they pleased. One hand snaked down her back, his fingers teasing at her ass, while the other dropped to her lap to tease at her clit.

Her breathing grew heavier and her hips became more erratic as he slipped a fingertip into her ass. "Come on, sweetheart, let go," Gabriel encouraged her. "Let it all out. I've got you, you're safe."

"Come with me, Gabe," Deanna pleaded breathlessly. "Wanna feel you come inside me."

"That's the plan," he said, smiling. He sped up his thrusts, fucking her hard and deep. He could feel his own loss of control as Deanna's muscles started squeezing his dick; he wasn't gonna last much longer. He wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly as he thrust into her a few more times. As he snapped his fingers, he cried out, "now!"

Deanna screamed as everything happened at once-Gabriel was coming, she could feel the thick muscle spasming inside her; wave after wave of ecstasy rolled over her body; lightning shot up and down her spine to every nerve ending. Galaxies exploded behind her eyelids, and it felt like her soul had caught fire and left her body only to return as a charred ember.

Gabriel slowly lowered her back to the bed, holding her close and dragging his lips across her face in pseudo-kisses of sorts. "You okay, sweetheart?"

"Groovy," Deanna said breathlessly, refusing to open her eyes in case it was just an awesome dream. Gabriel chuckled.

"You're whole again," he said a little more seriously. "Might mean it's gonna hurt more sometimes, but I think it'll be worth it."

As she came down from her high, she realized he was right. She didn't feel the empty numbness that she had the past few years. She might actually be able to smile without faking it now. "Ten points to Gryffindor," she said with a laugh, finally opening her eyes to look at Gabriel, a genuine smile on her face.

"I beg your pardon," he said with mock indignation, "I'm a Hufflepuff, thank you."

"So am I!" Deanna laughed. She reached over to her nightstand and opened a drawer, pulling out a pair of Hufflepuff socks. That had them both laughing as they cuddled closer to each other, Gabriel still holding her tight.

"So what were you saying earlier about a birthday party?" Gabriel asked her softly as her breathing evened out and she started dozing.

"Karaoke with the kids tonight," she murmured.

He kissed her forehead and said, "count me in. I'm the king of karaoke."

Deanna chuckled at that and replied, "I know someone who might disagree with you."

* * * * *

_We all enjoy fanfiction for different reasons. Some of us use it to escape reality, while others just use it to escape boredom. We use it to fill the time between episodes and while on hellatus. We love our characters so much we want to read more about them, put them in scenarios we've been in or would want to be in or just to sate our curiosity. We ship our characters because we see love even where it's not explicitly shown, seeing things where they weren't intended or would be missed by others. Fanfiction gives us all the power to be a part of our favorite characters' lives. It doesn't mean we're crazy._

_Now if you'll excuse me, I have another story to write..._


End file.
